Single Parent Weekend

Fred had to go to Alabama this weekend to help take care of some things due to his father passing away in August. I was left alone to parent two kids ALL BY MYSELF for a WHOLE weekend. I know that people do this all the time, but those people aren't me and I am definitely not cut out to be a single parent. When Fred got home, I told him to feel free to cheat on me or do any other horrible husband behavior he wants to for the next year, because I will definitely not leave him  until Bo is at least one! I wish I was kidding.

Needless to say, things didn't go so well over the weekend. Everything was okay until bed time Friday night. Neither kid would lay down without screaming. If one was down, the other was up for HOURS. There were several points where they were both up and crying. It's all a little hazy due to my exhaustion, but I can tell you that at some point Miller pooped in the bathroom floor. Have you had the pleasure of cleaning preschooler poop off a floor while holding a screaming baby? Well, I have.

Saturday started out fine. We had Miller's soccer game, she played with her friends across the street while Bo slept, and we had a floor picnic while we (I) watched the Carolina game. Let's not talk about that horrible display of football, by the way. So, since things were going so well, I thought we would walk up to the playground at my school. Spoiler alert: things did not go well from there.

We were all set to go when I realized I had left my phone in the house. I left the door open and ran in to get it. While my back was turned for 2 seconds, I heard, "Mommy, I'll just go ahead and push Bo down the driveway." I ran outside in slow motion yelling "NOOOOOOOO!"  It was too late. Bo's stroller (with him in it) was in the street and Miller was bawling and saying, "It wouldn't let me stop, Mommy! I tried to stop when you said no, but the stroller wouldn't let me!" Poor kid. She really didn't know she was doing anything wrong and she's lucky she didn't face plant while being dragged down the driveway. Bo is lucky we don't have much traffic on our street. Geez. I probably should have taken  that as a sign that we should have stayed home.

Instead, I got Miller sufficiently lectured and calmed down and we headed to the playground. Bo was asleep at this point. Two minutes later, he was not. He refused to go to sleep the whole time we were at the playground. I tried swaddling him, strolling him, shaking him (just kidding) and wearing him all while Miller yelled at me for not playing with her. Finally, I gave up. I stuffed that kid under my shirt and fed him. My nursing cover was conveniently at home, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, right?  And thank goodness I did because that put him right to sleep. For about ten minutes. Then he went back to screaming. At that point, I had to get out of there, so we walked back home with a baby screaming bloody murder and a very slow-walking, pouty Miller. It was delightful.

I decided my best plan of action for bedtime was to put Miller in front of a movie and get Bo down and just let her stay up until he was done with his night time up and down routine. She was up about 2 hours past her bedtime, but I avoided the drama of Friday night at least. That is what you call stellar parenting. You should probably be taking notes.  Oh well, I had them both down by 9:30 so  that was a success. Bo woke up about 146 times in the night, but who's counting?

Sunday, we just hung out and anxiously awaited Daddy's return home with Miller's  promised bribe of a Lite Brite for good behavior. I have never felt so relieved as I did when Fred walked in the door. I might have cried a little. He is never allowed to leave me again. Ever.